[x]

I Adore YouIt takes all my self-control
Not to take your hand
To squeeze your fingers so tight
Until the very core of your bones ache for me
To promise you I'll never let you feel alone
That in your darkness
I will never leave you
Even if you beg me
I won't go
I'll grab your hands and kiss you
I'll break the silence on your tongue
For how badly I want to hear you laugh
To see your lovely, stupid smile
And to know,
That you're going to be alright again
Because I adore you
More than words can say
More than thousands of poems
And buckets of used pens,
Ashes of burnt up pages
Useless stories
That could never say how m

Your LoveYour love is whiskey
Burning sweet
Sultry tangy bitter drops piercing my tongue
Gulps in my throat
The more I take, the more regrets I'll have
Were falling and tangling up
Further and further
At our breaking point
Shattering on the bathroom floor
Into pieces, broken bottles and hoarse screams
Mixing with pouring water and empty promises
Digging nails into skin
Whiskey spilling over onto the bed
Table tops and soaking clothes
Bitter
Addicting
Your love is like whiskey

IncreasingI don't like pain
I hate the way my scissors sting
I don't care for the way blood sticks to my wrists
The cotton itching against my opened skin
But I do like the feeling
The way I slump to the floor in reilef
My ignorance of the depth increasing
I don't like the pain
But I do love the feeling
The progress of the depth increasing
God, I love the feeling
Of the only peace I've known
That embrace that I have,
It may be the only one
The calming voice of skin splitting
The gentle smile of blood on silver
The only feeling of love I know
Getting stronger
As the depth's increasing

Forget MeQuietly you forget me
I'll slip away
Untwine my fingers from your warm hands
I was too late
I told you
I loved you
Just not how much
So now there's nothing left to do but watch you
And find solace in your peace
I'll take back my bags from you
I'll shoulder them myself
I'll do what people do
I'll play a sad song
(Or two)
And have a drink in your name
Maybe strike a match and burn your picure
Through my bitter sobs and angry tears
But maybe,
Tonight
I'll close my eyes and think of you
Your eyes
And your smile
Those odd things you'd try to hide so desperately
Those things that made you so real to me

HateBut I hate myself
I hate my fucking pride
And how much I speak out
I wish I could stop living
And just fall into your arms
Listen to your kind voice
Singing me to sleep
And your touch on my face
I wish I wasn't so stupid
That I have come to love you
I wish I could just leave
Because I have nothing left to say
I love you more than anything
But I don't even care
I just hate myself
I just
want
to
DIE.

HereI want you here with me
Under these trees
In petal covered grass
Leaning up against you and talking like we should
My muse, my heart-I want your peace and your sorrow
I want you in shadow or in sunlight
In depaire or in the high life
I want you, my night sky
My welcome heartache
My inspiration
My lover, my soul
My best friend, my partner
No matter how much anger, or hate fills me, I want you
I feel it inside me
I know it in my mind
I want your trust, your friendship
If I earn nothing more,
Beileve me....its fine.

All You Are Is MistShut up.
None of you are there
You promised.
You promised me you would never leave
I trusted you and you abandoned me
You left me like the worthless wretch I am
There is nothing left. Do you hear me?! Nothing!
You aren't there! None of you are there!
So just shut up.
And I'll cut
And cut
Under I can see that blood...
Like honey, a drug
Relief so hypnotic I stagger
The only cure...
You...my precious lover..
You are gone
All you are is mist.

DarlingWon't you please touch me like you did today?
Gently, like you don't want to break me
Can you please look at me like you did that afternoon?
Like I am the only thing that matters?
Can you kiss me like you did while I was sleeping?
Passionately, roughly
Hold me like you did that day
Like you would fall apart if you let me go
Can you help me back to my feet?
Shield the sun from my eyes
I would do the same
I'd shoulder the bags you carry, on top of mine
I'd never leave you or hurt you
So could you do the same?

AddictAddict
Addict Addict Addict
A few more cuts
One more slice
A few more drops, a little bit deeper
Crazy
Crazy Crazy Crazy
To get off on your own pain
Messed up
I'm insane
Addict
You can call it poetic
Brave
Sympathetic
But at the end of the day
I'm nothing but an addict

Over and OverI didn't cut today
Because when I was angry I thought of you
Of how when you dominated my thoughts
You appeared in front of me
The sudden light in your eyes
I haven't seen it for so long
And how it took my breath away
I try to remember the shaking of my hands
My swimming vision
So captivated by the motion of your mouth
Hypnotized by the warm crescendo of your voice
Drowning in the heat of your gaze
I smile
When I wonder about my self-control
Wondering why I didn't kiss you
And promise you that she could never love you
Not as much as me
I don't understand anything, really
Why I continue this
Over and over
A

Not SorryI'm sorry I'm a fuck-up
That I don't do as I'm told
I'm sorry I'm not submissive and that your words don't stop me cold
I don't give fuck if you hate me
That's just the worthless slut that I am
I don't care if you don't love me
Its just another blow
I'll shrug it off and walk away
Because I just don't care anymore
I'm watching every dream I have ever had crumble down around me
Your fist keeps on striking me and I don't feel a thing
I'll tear up this paper
I'll break everything in sight until there's silence
And you shut your mouth
I won't stop this pain (this pleasure) until I'm restored
It's a dirty, filthy path

GoodnightThe words
They pound inside my skull
They scream
They hurt, the things he says
I know better but I don't want to
But when I close my eyes to sleep they flash
Etch into my skin
Burn across my eyes
Two words
I've pleaded to hear so desperately
But dripping
Drops of liquor
From the wrong tongue, with a kiss that burns like salt
"Goodnight beautiful."

I'm FineI can't do this
I can't walk in smiling like everything is fine
Because its not
I can't put on a nice dress and act like I feel beautiful
Because I don't
I can't smile and laugh like I'm not dying
I don't want to walk in and see them
Her, in the place that I should be
Everyone having someone
A friend, a partner
Everyone but me
I can't just sit here
Crying my eyes out over this dress
Watching my anger hit the floor in shining, smaller teardrops
I can't hold it together
I can't do it anymore

ScreamingI won't cry
No matter how many nights I lay here screaming
I will not let a tear fall
I'll seal this bottle shut
Then I'll drink this one down...
Just hazy
Tiny
Miscroscopic red marks until the aching goes away
Night after night
Smear away the gore
Shaking in relief
But whimpering in fear
Because slowly, they will become deeper
And his touch, it will grow colder
And you will find your self screaming
All alone in his house
Pounding on the bedroom door
While he's holding her and you keep screaming
But nobody can hear you
Because you are all alone

Because you cannot stop.

Breakable.I've been there for all my friends heartbreak...there suffering, and there pain.
But, love when the time comes...
Will you be there for me?

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The Creation of the WorldBefore the start of anything, the birth of man or woman, the creation of animals and the formation of land masses, there was a war. Darkness was a thick blanket, constantly hovering over everything. It fought and fought, against something as insignificant as a tiny flicker of light trying to create life. As at this point there was no concept of time, no one knows how long this went on. For what must have been thousands of years the two entities destroyed nothing, going around in circles.

Then, the darkness came to the light while he was resting, tricking him into bed with her. As he slept beside her she killed him, and later birthed his chi

UnderstandHave you ever felt worthless?
Like no thought that came out of your head was worth while?
Do you understand what it feels like to have lost yourself inside his eyes?
Can you sympathize with just wanting to reach out and touch him.
Not even to speak to him
Just to hold him
The one thing that keeps you sane
The thoughts of his smile spinning through your head
Feeling him hold you
Dreaming of him
But knowing he is so far away from you

Do you understand
How it feels to love someone

That will never love you back

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#ShadowPoetry
For the darker side of poetry

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Submitted: October 20, 2012
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A Stranger

by *malphasloveshisfries, Oct 20, 2012, 11:20:46 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Its strange to see you
After all these months
This past year
The hell fires I fought through
Isn't it unfair?
How this little exchange works?
That you breaking me made me who I am
But who I am
Is someone who could have loved you
Wholly, fully.
Without limits.
The little quirks that this battle installed in me
Are things that could have saved me
Am I really?
Thinking about you?
Again?
About the way its been planned
That no matter how desprete I am,
For anyone, not just you
That I'm never going back
To anyone, not just you
This smarter, stronger girl
Is never being held again
Not with scencerity
Or compassion
Nothing but this anger
The traits that you built up in me
That would've made you love me
That this strange monster
With her fury and her fire
Has become me?

A Strangerby *malphasloveshisfries

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I saw an old friend a few days ago. Brought back some old memories, and I realized that losing your first love, that first person you dated is what makes you who you are. In my case, it made me someone who would have been better for him. Heartbreaking, yea?

-Ellie.