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Better Than the OriginalYou make me feel different
You take my breath away
And stare at me
You're the one thing I despretely need
Stepping close enough to me I feel your hair brushing my forehead
Angling your head down
Like you want me
Just as much as I need you
Making my skin feel warm
Plugging my wounds
Making me whole again
What Have You DoneWhat did you do to me?
Did you really have that much power over me?
Now I can't even feel the sun on my face
Without feeling like its not light but death clawing across my skin?
That I can't look at so much as a picture
Of grass and summer
With out feeling sick
Did you really have to destory me?
And rip something as beautiful as you away from me?
What the hell is wrong with you
I love you but I just don't care
Because now my main concern is this-
What the fuck did you do to me?!
All We Are Not...All I am is numbers
I am not expected to breathe of feel
Only think, and work
To my parent's, I am nothing but a GPA
Head down, under the table clutching a pen
Fighting every instinct telling me to do it
Dig in as deep as I can
Struggle and try to end it
The only question they ask isn't about me
I don't even think they care
Don't believe me, because I'm too perfect to want to die
But it doesn't matter
To them, its never enough.
Forever Gone...No more,
Gone, gone from this world...
Your existence forever erased but never forgotten.
Too many people gone.
Too many people missed.
Why, why leave this world where all of your friends are?
Where your family is?
Where your love is?
And so we mourn for you.
We take in the tragic news...
Too many deaths,
Too many losses.
It's just too much...
Too much for all of us.
To all those who took their own lives,
We loved you,
We cared for you.
Didn't you know that!?!?!
Death, suicide, gone forever.
We cry our hearts out at these tragic events.
Our hearts full of pai
Someone Like YouI can't stay away from you
We can't fight this
There' something more...just under your skin
The traces of your fingertips across my shoulders
My neck, my mouth
A thumb pushing away the saltwater on my cheeks
Your mouth turned down in frustration, and telling me you don't understand
But you don't say a word
You see the scratches on my arms
And you do speak now, and you ask me why I would do this
You pull the words out of me with no effort
My heartbroken story
How he left me
The first time I tried to end myself
The day I met you
The second time I tried
How you saved me
You manage to glue this br
Letter to GodHow is this fair?
Why are you doing this to me?
When I swear to honor you and be pure
I promise not to use the bottle and I lose him
You let him trade me
And they do the opposite
And they drink until the bottle is empty
And give into lust
They get to have each other
But me, who fallowed your orders
Who obeyed you
And those who don't listen
Who don't even give a damn
I am the one who lost him
They are the ones who are together
I am the one who's broken
They are so whole with each other
What kind of God
Could let this happen?
Is this part of your sick plan?
To break the girl who's broken?
Figure It OutI've figured it out
Why when I think of you I break down
Because everyday I plunge deeper into this blackness
And I can't see the truth
As horrible as that sounds
But I don't know
If your just what you seem
A liar and deciever
Or if the way you look at me means something
But the reason I'm sobbing is simple
I think I'm falling in love with you
Slowly, but steadily
And I can't make it stop
No matter how bad I want to
It would be better for everyone if I was gone
And I didn't stumble over my own feet around you
I'm crying because I know I'll get hurt
But I'm powerless to stop myself from wanting you
Alright...You make me feel beautiful
Like all my flaws perfect me
Just looking at you makes me smile
Meeting your eyes turns me to nothing
But I'm something
You care about
And even though this affair will be short
I don't care
Because you make everything seem worth it again
You pinch the sun between your forefingers
And pull it back to the sky
You make him turn and run
When you smile I know
What I didn't think was possible
Is with you
The perfection of your eyes makes me
That I'm going to be alright.
you made me sad...Just one more second...
Just one more word...
That's all i wish to have.
You left so suddenly,
and i found out after it was too late.
I wish you you were back here;
working by my side
i wish i could smile and look back into your eyes.
Did you realize i like you as much as i did?
Heck, i even told you.
That took courage...
i remember shaking because i was so nervous.
I told you i liked you- you were the first and only.
You shut me down;
(and thats why i don't let others not how i feel;
because i fear they will turn me down too.)
I remember crying (sad isn't it?)
I remember feeling worthless and unloved...
i guess I'm easy to
For LoveI did it all for love.
All that I could do
I did it for you,
I stood up against everyone,
I did what I wanted to do.
I followed my heart
and it led me to you.
You followed your heart
and it led you to me.
Everyday was a perfect day.
You liked me and I liked you.
And we want more,
we need to live more now.
Future plans is what we have,
we will focus on that.
I will fight for our love.
There Are Two Sides to Every StoryIs this an act?
Do you want me back?
That empty smile mercilessly knifed across your face
The reflection of my own broken soul in your eyes
Is that supossed to mean you over me?
Your stares in my direction
And the first time I've seen true light in your eyes
Your little act
And secret stares
Feather light smile weighed down by guilt
Convincing as they might be
Sweetie, don't even try to say your over me
Addict Addict Addict
A few more cuts
One more slice
A few more drops, a little bit deeper
Crazy Crazy Crazy
To get off on your own pain
You can call it poetic
But at the end of the day
I'm nothing but an addict
36. Precious TreasureYour eyes are like the sky in day,
Your mind is in itself the blazing sun
My picture of you leads me astray
There are you, unique and one!
Precious Treasure, far away
I'm not the hunter, but the pawn
Kill me now, finish the day
I'm a puppet, a mere clown
Longing for your Precious Treasure!
LiquorKisses twinged with liquor
My imagination? Or a reality
I'm drunk. Shit-faced. Plastered.
All I wanted was you. Was that so hard?
I just needed to lose myself for one night.
Spinning, going down. Throat burning. Eyes drowning.
Does this brokenness ever stop?
Am I ever going to find someone?
I know I'm young, but I've never needed someone more than I wanted him.
So keep them coming. Bottle after bottle.
Whiskey. Vodka. Rum.
I don't care, just make sure I can't feel anything.
Nothing. Especially him.
His kisses on my mouth, my neck and the back of my hands.
And my sobbing, scared to death.
What scared me was how ha
She was the Light She was the Light
The music that surrounds these lyrics
They don't understand
But I can hear it
I can hear it
The hidden message
That you can only find
From reading in-between the lines
These broken lines
That fell apart
When you left her
When you took her heart
When you took her heart
How could you leave
With the door wide open?
You never believed
She'd have loved you longer
She wrote you letters
In her familiar slant
She kept them all
She could never send them
And she still can't
And where were you
On the days she cried
She had always known
That you had lied
She never beli
SympathyMy scars are fading
And I'm panicking
I'm nothing without these tiny little marks
Those torturous bits of ecstasy
That draw me down
Away from the light
Away from there prying eyes
My pain keeps me away
But Oh God how I hate it
But Oh, Hell would be living without it
Binds and shackles
I'm just empty doll
Stiff in his arms
How he loves me, I don't know
Why he'd want to
I can't let go of the only one who matters
But this isn't love
This is desperation
This is obsession
And a beautiful mans sympathy
Morphine EyesYour hands are so much bigger than my own
And I find it enchanting-the display of your fingers touching mine
Like a mirror, I can see myself in you
In the sea blue of those morphine eyes
Surely beauty does not exist elsewhere
Maybe God has created you from the clay of the earth himself
And captured the glow of the moon in your iris
And your laugh has been woven from the bells of heaven
I wish you could see how I look at you, my love
That just for a moment you could see just how beautiful you are
Even if you don't like it, I can see it
Your gentle hands
And the curve of your mouth
You are a wonder to me
Both you, and
Pasted On Your FaceIt's really just a simple brushstroke
A happy masquerade
You think of how strong you are
And paste it on your face
You try not to act like
Blood's sticking to the underside of your shirt
And that you weren't just cursing yourself
Becuause she got there first
And you act like its all fine, it's all good
That you aren't being tortured
As much as you should
That you aren't devestatingly lonely
And your trashed heart isn't broken
You smear this act
This pointless coat of paint across your skin
Like everything is fine
Shut Up, VoiceI'm not worthless
But you are
Today I'll tell him
He'll just laugh at you
I want to stop
But you can't
I'm tired of being broken
You'll never be whole again
I'm better than this
You are nothing
I'll stand up to them
They'll just hit you again
I could be perfect if I try
Not as perfect as her
I don't want to go down that road again
All you can do is crawl
I'm not going to cut today
You're going to write that note today
They'll have to stop, sometime
It's not going to end
Why We Bother TryingWhy do I even bother trying?
I'm never going to change
I'm not strong enough
Why do I even try to make myself something?
Maybe they're right
And I am nothing
I will be nothing
I'll just stay here forever
I'm never getting out
I'm never going to be free of them
They'll keep hurting me
The two halves that created my life
Something nobody wanted
That I never wanted
But something that someone else wanted?
That he wanted?
And I wasn't anything
I had nothing to give
But he had everything to gain
So instead we both threw it away
Because we don't know anymore
Why we bother trying
BadI don't think I've ever felt this bad
Shaking so hard I can barely breathe
Curled up on an empty staircase with my head between my knees
I am dying you idiots.
I'm sitting here trying to rip open my arm with my nails
I'm trying to carve that damned word-worthless in
So that I never forget
You don't see
That none of it is fiction
You just keep thinking that everything is false
You snarl at me not to cry
And that makes me just like everyone else
Am I really so worthless?
Everyone would lead me here to die?
That not a single person would try and dry my eyes?
Am I so prideful, so self-deprecating
WhyHow does this happen?
Why did we go here?
Why are we apart
Why is this romance splintered
Why are we driven apart?
How is it fair that they're love
Not built on partnership but on lust
Has lasted this long
We we're stronger then them you idiot!
We we're so much better!
How did this happen?
How the hell did we get here?
What will it take, love
Just to get us out?
Keep in Touch!
`ChewedKandi has certainly gone out of her way to keep the vector community on the right path. Always making sure that her talents are infinitely scalable, Sharon has put her bezier curves to excellent use, and firmly anchored herself as an inspirational leader. We're absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for June 2013 to `ChewedKandi. Congratulations, Sharon! Read More